Why Online Chat Is Dangerous for Children

The Hidden Danger in "Kid-Friendly" Games

When we think about digital dangers for children, explicit websites or violent games often come to mind first. But one of the most significant threats to a child's physical and emotional safety lurks in what appear to be innocent places: the chat features in games, apps, and platforms designed specifically for children.

Online chat functionality is one of the most physically dangerous digital features a child can be exposed to, creating direct pathways for predators to access children. Even in seemingly innocent environments—racing games, dress-up games, or educational platforms—the addition of chat capabilities introduces substantial risk.

According to UNICEF and the UN Special Representative on Violence against Children, one in three young people across 30 countries report being a victim of online bullying, with many experiencing it multiple times (UN OHCHR, 2023). The FBI, National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, and other law enforcement agencies continue to see alarming increases in online exploitation cases that began with contact through chat features in games and apps designed for children.

Understanding Sextortion: A Growing Threat

Sextortion—a form of exploitation that combines sexual content with extortion—has become increasingly prevalent in online environments where children interact. According to the FBI, sextortion can lead victims to self-harm and has led to at least 20 suicides from October 2021 to March 2023 (CBS News, 2023).

Here's how these scenarios typically unfold:

1. Initial Contact: An adult joins an online game, chat platform, or social media site and creates a profile posing as a child or teenager.
2. Relationship Building: The predator befriends a child who believes they're interacting with a peer, not an adult. This grooming phase may last days, weeks, or even months as trust is established.
3. Solicitation: After establishing a relationship (sometimes romantic in nature), the predator solicits photos or videos of a sexual nature from the child.
4. Revelation and Threats: Once the predator obtains compromising content, they reveal their true identity and begin making threats. Typically, they threaten to share the sexual content with the child's family, friends, and social networks unless demands are met.
5. Exploitation: The predator may demand money, additional sexual content, or even in-person meetings.

The consequences of sextortion can be devastating, ranging from financial loss and emotional trauma to physical harm if in-person meetings occur. The National Center for Missing & Exploited Children (NCMEC) received 26,718 reports of financial sextortion in 2023 alone (NCMEC, 2024), highlighting the widespread nature of this threat.

High-Risk Platforms with Chat Functionality

While no online platform with chat features can be considered completely safe, some present particularly high risks for children due to their popularity, design, or lack of effective safety controls. According to the FBI, sextortion commonly occurs on social media, gaming sites, and other online platforms with communication features popular with minors (FBI Nashville, 2023).

It's important to note that even platforms with stronger safety measures can still be exploited by determined predators. The presence of chat functionality itself—regardless of the platform—introduces inherent risk.

Practical Protection Strategies for Parents

Protecting children from online chat dangers requires a comprehensive approach, focusing primarily on limiting access to chat features rather than relying solely on monitoring or education—though those aspects are also important.

1. Conduct a Digital Audit

Begin by understanding exactly which platforms your child has access to and how they use them:

• App inventory: Review all apps, games, and platforms on your child's devices
• Experience each platform: Create an account and explore chat capabilities yourself
• Ask questions: Have an open conversation with your child about where they talk to other people online
• Look beyond the obvious: Remember that chat features exist in many unexpected places, including educational games and seemingly innocent apps

2. Disable or Restrict Chat Features

For each platform that has chat capabilities, take these steps:

• Check for parental controls: Many games allow parents to disable chat with a password
• Adjust privacy settings: Limit interactions to approved friends only where possible
• Disable voice chat: Voice communication presents particularly high risks
• Consider removal: If chat functions can't be disabled and present significant risk, consider removing the app entirely

3. Use Technical Controls

Implement broader technical solutions for additional protection:

• Network-level filtering:
  • Solutions like Circle, Gryphon, or CleanBrowsing can block communication with known risky domains
  • For tech-savvy parents - DNS filtering with NextDNS: Provides comprehensive protection by blocking connections to inappropriate content, dangerous domains, and tracking services before they reach your child's device. NextDNS requires some technical knowledge to set up but offers more powerful protection than standard filtering tools. It can be configured at the router level (protecting your entire home network) or on individual devices (for protection anywhere). Key features include:
    • Block access to chat platforms and inappropriate websites
    • Create different filtering profiles for each family member
    • Monitor attempts to connect to blocked services
    • Protect devices even when away from home
    • Block tracking and analytics services that collect data
• Device-level controls: Use Screen Time (iOS) or Family Link (Android) to restrict app usage and features
• Privacy-focused browsers: Switch to browsers with built-in privacy protections like Firefox or Safari (on Apple devices) instead of Chrome
• Monitoring software: For older children, consider tools that alert you to potentially dangerous communications

4. Educate Appropriately

While education alone is not sufficient protection, age-appropriate discussions are still important:

• For younger children (under 13): Focus on simple rules ("Never share personal information," "Tell a parent if someone asks you to keep secrets")
• For teens: Have more detailed conversations about tactics predators use, including love-bombing, isolation tactics, and pressure techniques
• Create safety plans: Ensure children know exactly what to do if approached inappropriately online

If You Suspect Your Child Has Been Targeted

If you believe your child has already been contacted by a predator or is the victim of sextortion, taking swift and appropriate action is critical:

1. Stay calm and supportive: Make it clear that your child is not in trouble and that you're there to help
2. Do not pay extortion demands: Payment rarely stops the threats and may lead to increased demands
3. Preserve evidence: Take screenshots of communications, but do not continue engaging with the perpetrator
4. Report to law enforcement: Contact local police and file a report with the FBI's Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3)
5. Report to the platform: Use the platform's reporting tools to flag the account
6. Seek support: Consider counseling resources for your child to address any trauma

A Final Word: Prevention is Key

The most effective strategy against online predators is preventing initial contact. While education and monitoring have their place, the limitation or complete elimination of chat functionality represents the strongest protective measure available to parents.

Children simply do not need to chat with strangers online. The risks far outweigh any potential benefits. Until platforms can truly guarantee safety—which may never be possible—the wisest approach is to treat online chat features as what they are: one of the most significant digital risks to children's safety.

By taking concrete steps to audit, disable, and control chat features across your child's digital ecosystem, you create meaningful protection against one of the most common pathways predators use to access and exploit children.